So you married an entrepreneur!
Lately I have had my eyes opened to an issue that hits some of us entrepreneurs where it hurts the most…at home. To back up a little, I should say that I am pretty fortunate because I am married to someone who gets it. Who understands the struggles of starting and then maintaining a business. Someone who understands that maybe you don’t just turn a key and the money pours in. So I am very thankful. But as she is human, her understanding can sometimes slide a little.
The reassuring part of her slide is that, after talking to many business owners, most of them share the same experience. They have partners or spouses who, from time to time, resent the “presumed” free time and fortune, of a business owner. The part that most of us aren’t prepared for is the stress that we get from our partner.
To be fair, I think we all had an idea of what it would be like to own a business in our heads, prior to doing it, that was very glamorous and grandiose. But as the owner, you get a rude awakening from this glorious slumber as soon as the bills start rolling in! Luckily for me, I come from a family that has always owned their own businesses. My father was a custom home builder in Orillia, and I have several cousins who all own their own businesses. So I realized at an early age that it is not always “sunny” in the land of ownership.
But what about our “better halves” who don’t have the privilege of seeing the dark side of business or the day-to-day challenges that we uniquely face. I decided to write this blog because as I said before, I have had my eyes opened to the other side recently. I have a friend who is going through this with his wife right now. She started a business and now he assumed the dual role of at home sales representative for a company, and caregiver for his three kids. He tells me of how he is now responsible for doing his own job (which I used to be in and I can tell you it is as stressful as anything I have ever experienced), as well as doing everything at his home, 7 days a week. So he started to vent to me about what irks him about his situation.
Overall, what I took from this was that as a couple, we obviously want our spouses to succeed in everything they try. We want them to be happy and healthy, but I think most of all, we want them around. This may not sound shocking, but it speaks to me in almost an animalistic way. It breeds an underlying sentiment that is really quite beautiful “I realize that we are doing this to live but what I inherently want is you”. It is quite nice actually. Out of the complaining that I have heard, and the stories that have been told, this was the overwhelming message.
I was happy to write this blog because during these stressful times, we need to find the silver lining. Stop and realize what we are REALLY doing this for. I used to believe it was for money and status, but in the end, I think it is more about who you share your successes with no matter how big or small.
March 7, 2012 Uncategorized 0 Comment(s)